The Groovy Giraffe - Singapore's First Official Online Remainder Bookstore

If you remember, one of the things that I wanted to do before I went to London (in 2006!) was to set up a website. Well I have finally done that, another thing off my bucket list. If you are interested in good books at very reasonable prices, and support independent bookshops, do check this out. As far as I am aware, we are the first official (who admits) remainder bookstore in Singapore. So, you might ask what remainder books are. Remainder books are brand new, overstock and overprint books. Bookshops return these books back to publishers and the latter will sell them at a discount. Please note that these are not second-hand books nor rejected stock. Some of these books, especially the heavily discounted ones in our shop may display minor shelf wear and/or remainder markings, but are otherwise brand new books. We carry a great range of baby books, cloth books, picture books, cookbooks, coffee table books, and even fiction and non-fiction texts etc, you can find books for almost everybody in the family. Our repository is fully stocked with all of our titles, so you do not have to wait for weeks for your favourite books to be delivered to you. We seek to deliver the books to you within 3 working days! Come in and take a look at the titles we carry! Currently, there is a free delivery promotion for orders $60 and above. And for this weekend only, there's a cookbook promotion! Click here to find out more! http://thegroovygiraffe.com/

How to save your own life

Good read by Michael Gates Gill

P26

The other day I made a list of a few of the places where I have found unexpected joy

1) In the surprising satisfaction of working really hard to clean a toilet and making a bathroom sparkle like a new car
2) In the song I happen to overhear that sends me singing out loud as i walk down the block
3) in the warm sun of an early April day that catches me by surprise when I spent sio many months getting used to the cold gray days of winter
4) In the delight of going to bed on a rainy afternoon with a good book
5) in the deep enjoyment of spending time with my children - simple lunches in the city or long walks in the country - as I observe and marvel as they create their own remarkable lives
6) In the feeling of gratitude in waking at the beautiful first light of dawn
7) In the simple act of sharing a smile or a joke as i serve others a good cup of coffee
8) In walking home in the soft blue dusk of summer and seeing a full moon rising in the sky

Wisdom

The Dalai Lama was asked what surprised him most, he said "Man. Because he sacrifices his health in order to make money. Then he sacrifices money to recuperate his health. And then he is so anxious about the future that he does not enjoy the present; the result being that he does not live in the present or the future; he lives as if he is never going to die, and then dies having never really lived."

Part III of my life?

My very first blog in 2011! Amazingly how badly I have neglected this blog since I graduated from LBS (the very reason why this blog was started).

I am currently serving two months of gardening leave before I start on my new job. Having time on my hands, I started to read my own blog, its kinda of a journal, highly interesting (at least to me!) and that is what prompted me to update this today.

So what am I going to do/have done in this two month break?

1) Kuala Lumpur: I have went to Malaysia to visit my sister, saw the largest book fair in the World. Very impressed and again inspiring, I really should set up my own business, soon.
2) Hong Kong: I just came back from HK last night. Had a really good time, stayed at my friend's place at New Territories. Really nice place which is just next to the waters. Saw a side of HK which I never did. We did hiking at Sai Kong (much tougher than I thought, and I thought I was quite fit from my daily jogging, guess I was wrong, time to increase the intensity of my exercise regime). Its a really nice place where there are properly organised public buses to fetch you after you are done as well as little villages where you can take a break, enjoy a ice cream etc. We ended up at a nice little beach before heading back to eat seafood, fresh seafood that they just caught from the waters!
3) Taiwan: heading to Taiwan in Dec. This will be our second trip. We want to cover those places which we missed the last time round (Alishan, Yushan, YangMingshan, Hotsprings at Yilan, and a couple other places in Taipei(and nearby)
4) Exercise, Exercise, Exercise - the idea is to continue when I start work, either with a quick run in the park or on our elliptical cross trainer machine. Started Yoga,. its really fun! Will want to resume the tennis sessions soon!
5) Tailored a whole bunch clothes - no more poorly fit shirts and pants!
6) Cleaned, packed the whole house - its been close to 1.5 years since we moved in, chandeliers are tarnished (metals!!), I found things which I lost long ago! Even managed to clean the aircon using a DIY kit!
7) Met up with long lost friends! Friends are important to remain in contact!
8) Reviewed insurance plans for me and esp wife, probably will set up a will, met a really good independent financial planner, she has this sense of abundance and spirit to help people which is amazing, I really want to know more people like this
9) Found a really good stock portfolio excel online - will enter the market soon if this is an opportunity
10) Got a new sofa (hope the cream colour leather will not be too challenging to maintain), thinking of getting a new dishwasher
11) Last but not least - finally did Lasik, totally well worth the risk! I have perfect eyesight now (only downside is a little dry on some days, best part is that its getting better all the time)

How to be happy - Happy 2011!

Personality:
1. Don't compare your life to others'. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
2. Don't have negative thoughts of things you cannot control. Instead invest your energy in the positive present moment
3. Don't over do; keep your limits
4. Don't take yourself so seriously; no one else does
5. Don't waste your precious energy on gossip
6. Dream more while you are awake
7. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need..
8. Forget issues of the past. Don't remind your partner of his/her mistakes of the past. That will ruin your present happiness.
9. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone. Don't hate others.
10. Make peace with your past so it won't spoil the present
11. No one is in charge of your happiness except you
12. Realize that life is a school and you are here to learn. Problems are simply part of the curriculum that appear and fade away like algebra class but the lessons you learn will last a lifetime.
13. Smile and laugh more
14. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.

Community:
15. Call your family often
16. Each day give something good to others
17. Forgive everyone for everything
18. Spend time with people over the age of 70 & under the age of 6
19. Try to make at least three people smile each day
20. What other people think of you is none of your business
21. Your job will not take care of you when you are sick. Your family and friends will. Stay in touch.

Life:
24. Do the right things
25. However good or bad a situation is, it will change
26. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up
27. The best is yet to come
28. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful
29. When you awake alive in the morning, thank your love ones

The eternal question – how much cash do you need to retire?

V insightful article...

The eternal question – how much cash do you need to retire?


Geraint Anderson - 'Geraint Anderson is the author of Cityboy - Beer and Loathing in the Square Mile.'

How much cash do you need to retire? That was the perennial question colleagues and I asked in the early stages of our City career. I suppose the fact we were debating this issue suggested our jobs weren’t completely fulfilling but then none of us had any illusions that our daily toil was motivated by anything other that the wish to accumulate as much cash as quickly as possible.

We even referred to work periods in the Square Mile as if they were prison sentences … someone who’d got out after a decade had done a ‘ten year stretch’ whilst those still in the game at 50 were called ‘lifers’.

I, and many of those in my ‘inner circle of trust,’ were frustrated artists and scientists. We’d sold our souls to the City merely because the pinstriped demons there were offering us the best price. We knew full well that life was short and that slaving away at spread sheets or talking to obnoxious clients was not how we’d choose to spend our years on this planet, but we struck a bargain with Mammon: you can have some of our youth but only so that our later years are truly free and joyous.

In 1998, we sat down to try and cement a figure that would allow us to live a reasonable life of few major extravagances but no financial worries until we’d shuffled off this mortal coil. Although there were differences of opinion the average net asset value (gross assets minus all liabilities like mortgages etc) we all agreed upon was … £2.5m.
For that, we figured you could buy a decent house out right in London (£700k) and a small gaff in the country (£300K). We then assumed that you could make an average annual post-tax return of 5% on the remaining £1.5m (£75K per annum). Combine this with £25K of annual income from bits and bobs you and your partner made as you tripped the light fantastic and you have a yearly post-tax ‘salary’ of £100K without even dipping into your capital.
Of course, you couldn’t buy Ferraris, get divorced too often, send your kids to Eton, but you could travel endlessly, drink fine wines, eat at restaurants regularly and never feel truly constrained by cash.
In February 2008 (7 years later than originally planned), at the age of 35 my net assets reached this mythical figure and I walked. Whilst the return I’ve achieved so far on my capital has been negative due to weak markets it has been without doubt the best decision I’ve ever made.
Money’s main role should be to grant you freedom to do what you want when you want. The endless pursuit of ever-flasher possessions merely builds a gilded cage that traps you and postpones your joy to when you’re not fit and healthy enough to truly enjoy it.

An American businessman took a vacation to a small coastal Mexican village on doctor’s orders. Unable to sleep after an urgent phone call from the office the first morning, he walked out to the pier to clear his head. A small boat with just one fisherman had docked, and inside the boat were several large yellowfin tuna. The American complimented the Mexican on the quality of his fish.
“How long did it take you to catch them?” the American asked.
“Only a little while,” the Mexican replied in surprisingly good English.
“Why don’t you stay out longer and catch more fish?” the American then asked.
“I have enough to support my family and give a few to friends,” the Mexican said as he unloaded them into a basket.
“But… What do you do with the rest of your time?”
The Mexican looked up and smiled. “I sleep late, fish a little, play with my children, take a siesta with my wife, Julia, and stroll into the village each evening, where I sip wine and play guitar with my amigos. I have a full and busy life, senor.”
The American laughed and stood tall. “Sir, I’m a Harvard M.B.A. and can help you. You should spend more time fishing, and with the proceeds, buy a bigger boat. In no time, you could buy several boats with the increased haul. Eventually, you would have a fleet of fishing boats.”
He continued, “Instead of selling your catch to a middleman, you would sell directly to the consumers, eventually opening your own cannery. You would control the product, processing, and distribution. You would need to leave this small coastal fishing village, of course, and move to Mexico City, then to Los Angeles, and eventually New York City, where you could run your expanding enterprise with proper management.”
The Mexican fisherman asked, “But, senor, how long will all this take?”
To which the American replied, “15-20 years. 25 tops.”
“But what then, senor?”
The American laughed and said, “That’s the best part. When the time is right, you would announce an IPO and sell your company stock to the public and become very rich. You would make millions.”
“Millions, senor? Then what?”
“Then you would retire and move to a small coastal fishing village, where you would sleep late, fish a little, play with your kids, take a siesta with your wife, and stroll to the village in the evening where you could sip wine and play your guitar with your amigos…”

MR

My unit become MR last Friday. Its very last ICT. It was tough, so tough most of us hated it, for lack of efficiency, for the unreasonable demands of the trainers, for the sun, the lack of sleep etc

But still I felt a sense of loss. A feeling that something had ended. It was a joy working with this group of people, otherwise my 2.5 years would have been much worse, and maybe even a total waste of time. I made very good friends there, perhaps the best in my life. I became more matured. Stronger.

The family day came and passed. Instead of girlfriends. I see my mates with toddlers in their arms. Suddenly it dawned upon me that I might be, and most likely is, getting old. People are driving instead of walking. Talking about houses and careers instead of university and breakups with their gfs.

It seems to mark a second leg of my life. And incidentally I will be getting married next month!

18th Jan 1996 to 17th May 1998

Coding Simplicity: How to Avoid Feature Creep in Your Life

Post written by Leo Babauta. Follow me on Twitter.

http://zenhabits.net/2009/10/simplicity-how-to-avoid-feature-creep-in-your-life/#more-4825

There’s a concept in programming called “feature creep” — when a software developer continually adds one feature after another because “wouldn’t it be nice” and “why not” and “isn’t it cool” and “some users asked for it”.

The end result is often a bloated program that tries to do everything but ends up being not very good at any of it — and hogs your system resources, crashes, and has a complicated interface.

Feature creep is a bad thing in programming, and it’s a bad thing in our personal lives as well.

We all have feature creep in our lives. It’s a part of the modern world.

Think about how life was like only 20 years ago — no one was using the Internet (basically), we didn’t have IM or email or Twitter or blogs or any of the other complications we have today. And 50 years ago, no one had personal computers, caller ID, cable TV, fax machines, washing machines, CD players. Go back 100 years, a thousand, and then ten thousand, and you’ll see how many features have been added into our lives.

Think about when you started out as an adult: you might have had basically nothing, including no debt (until you got that first student credit card, car loan and perhaps student loan), no furniture, no house full of stuff, no long to-do list. Now, this might not be the ideal life (you also might have had no means to do anything, or a solid career, or skills) … but you had a fresh slate. No features was a negative, but there was also no bloat.

Some of you might still be at that point — so let this be a cautionary tale.

Those of you who are 10 or 20 or more years beyond that point know that life isn’t that simple anymore — at least, not for most of us. Life tends to add features as we go along, and as they come out into the marketplace.

We now have all the Internet technology we mentioned above, but there’s more. There’s debt and all kinds of payments to make. There’s kids and all the things that come with that (an amazing array of features, good and bad). There’s more responsibilities and commitments and a more crowded schedule.

We’re not bored, and we have more means, and a career, likely. But these features bring much more: burdens, and an overloaded schedule, and conflicts that can lead to crashes. Headaches we don’t need.

The solution to feature creep in our lives:

1. Start from a blank slate.
2. Only add the features you really use and love.
3. Slowly implement the reduction in the code of your life.
4. Avoid future feature creep.

Let’s look at these steps.

Step 1. Start from a blank slate.
I’m not saying you should abandon your home and cars and family and job and go live in a cave. I’m saying take out a fresh sheet of paper (or a blank text file — but do NOT use Microsoft Word) and re-image your life. From a blank canvas.

Imagine your life had nothing in it. We’re going to be bolder than Microsoft and Adobe and do what they need to do: abandon software that has become bloated over a decade or two of feature creep, and start our code from scratch.

You might also make a list of everything you have in your life now: job, commitments, goals, activities, clubs, hobbies, meetings, relationships, technology, possessions. Anything that takes up your time and space and mental energy. These are the things we’re putting on the table. They are going to be tossed out if they don’t survive the next section.

Step 2. Only add the features you really use and love.
What do you want in your life? Focus on fewer features done well.

What is your ideal life? Your ideal day? What do you want to do, for work and play and love?

Look at the list you made in the first section — what do you want to keep? Don’t keep them because they’re nice, or have sentimental value. Keep them because they’re a part of the life you want.

Pick only a few things. This will allow you to have the space — time and physical space — to really enjoy them, to do them well.

Step 3. Slowly implement the reduction in the code of your life.
You probably can’t just toss out your old life and implement the newly re-imagined life. Unfortunately. It takes time to get out of commitments, to make the big changes that are required to get to this new life.

But it can be done, slowly, gradually, over time. Not overnight.

You can do some things right away: go through your home and toss out stuff you don’t want. You have control over that. You can also call or email people to get out of commitments, projects, meetings, jobs you don’t want and don’t absolutely need at the moment.

Other things can be done in the coming weeks. Slowly find ways to get out of tough commitments. Let others fade away.

Still others will take more time: changing houses, jobs, getting rid of cars, moving to a new place, getting out of debt. I’ve done all these, but it didn’t happen immediately. It takes a decision to make an eventual change, an awareness of opportunities as they arise, and the will to carry out the change.

Step 4. Avoid future feature creep.
Let’s say you simplify the features in your life in the next couple of weeks, and eventually get to a life of few but great features. What’s to stop feature creep from insinuating itself again?

Nothing except your awareness, and constant vigilance.

Being aware of feature creep is really the only way to combat it. Often these features come into our lives without much thought — we buy new things, agree to new projects, start using new technologies, one little thing at a time. But if we question everything, and are aware of what we’re adding and the big picture, we can say no.

Constant vigilance is simply saying no if it’s not a feature you absolutely need. Try out new features, and reject all but the best. And when you add new features, consider dropping old ones.

Revisit this issue every few months to see if you need to eliminate unnecessary code in your life.

Don't Be Afraid To Fail

You've failed many times , although you may not remember.
You fell down the first time you tried to walk.
You almost drowned the first time you tried to swim, didn't you?
Did you hit the ball the first time you swung a bat?
Heavy hitters, the ones who hit the most home runs, also strike out a lot.
R. H. Macy failed seven times before his store in New York caught on.
English novelist John Creasey got 753 rejection slips before he published 564 books.
Babe Ruth struck out 1,330 times, but he also hit 714 home runs.
Don't worry about failure.
Worry about the chances you miss when you don't even try.

A message as published in the Wall Street Journal
by United Technologies Corporation,
Hartford, Connecticut 06101

賽翁失馬 焉知非福

Slowing Down and Enjoying Life More

The 10 Essential Rules for Slowing Down and Enjoying Life More

Post written by Leo Babauta. Follow me on Twitter.

It’s an irony of our modern lives that while technology is continually invented that saves us time, we use that time to do more and more things, and so our lives are more fast-paced and hectic than ever.

Life moves at such a fast pace that it seems to pass us by before we can really enjoy it.

However, it doesn’t have to be this way. Let’s rebel against a hectic lifestyle and slow down to enjoy life.

A slower-paced life means making time to enjoy your mornings, instead of rushing off to work in a frenzy. It means taking time to enjoy whatever you’re doing, to appreciate the outdoors, to actually focus on whoever you’re talking to or spending time with — instead of always being connected to a Blackberry or iPhone or laptop, instead of always thinking about work tasks and emails. It means single-tasking rather than switching between a multitude of tasks and focusing on none of them.

Slowing down is a conscious choice, and not always an easy one, but it leads to a greater appreciation for life and a greater level of happiness.

Here’s how to do it.

1. Do less. It’s hard to slow down when you are trying to do a million things. Instead, make the conscious choice to do less. Focus on what’s really important, what really needs to be done, and let go of the rest. Put space between tasks and appointments, so you can move through your days at a more leisurely pace. Read more.

2. Be present. It’s not enough to just slow down — you need to actually be mindful of whatever you’re doing at the moment. That means, when you find yourself thinking about something you need to do, or something that’s already happened, or something that might happen … gently bring yourself back to the present moment. Focus on what’s going on right now. On your actions, on your environment, on others around you. This takes practice but is essential.

3. Disconnect. Don’t always be connected. If you carry around an iPhone or Blackberry or other mobile device, shut it off. Better yet, learn to leave it behind when possible. If you work on a computer most of the day, have times when you disconnect so you can focus on other things. Being connected all the time means we’re subject to interruptions, we’re constantly stressed about information coming in, we are at the mercy of the demands of others. It’s hard to slow down when you’re always checking new messages coming in.

4. Focus on people. Too often we spend time with friends and family, or meet with colleagues, and we’re not really there with them. We talk to them but are distracted by devices. We are there, but our minds are on things we need to do. We listen, but we’re really thinking about ourselves and what we want to say. None of us are immune to this, but with conscious effort you can shut off the outside world and just be present with the person you’re with. This means that just a little time spent with your family and friends can go a long way — a much more effective use of your time, by the way. It means we really connect with people rather than just meeting with them.

5. Appreciate nature. Many of us are shut in our homes and offices and cars and trains most of the time, and rarely do we get the chance to go outside. And often even when people are outside, they’re talking on their cell phones. Instead, take the time to go outside and really observe nature, take a deep breath of fresh air, enjoy the serenity of water and greenery. Exercise outdoors when you can, or find other outdoor activities to enjoy such as nature walks, hiking, swimming, etc. Feel the sensations of water and wind and earth against your skin. Try to do this daily — by yourself or with loved ones.

6. Eat slower. Instead of cramming food down our throats as quickly as possible — leading to overeating and a lack of enjoyment of our food — learn to eat slowly. Be mindful of each bite. Appreciate the flavors and textures. Eating slowly has the double benefit of making you fuller on less food and making the food taste better. I suggest learning to eat more real food as well, with some great spices (instead of fat and salt and sugar and frying for flavor).

7. Drive slower. Speedy driving is a pretty prevalent habit in our fast-paced world, but it’s also responsible for a lot of traffic accidents, stress, and wasted fuel. Instead, make it a habit to slow down when you drive. Appreciate your surroundings. Make it a peaceful time to contemplate your life, and the things you’re passing. Driving will be more enjoyable, and much safer. You’ll use less fuel too.

8. Find pleasure in anything. This is related to being present, but taking it a step farther. Whatever you’re doing, be fully present … and also appreciate every aspect of it, and find the enjoyable aspects. For example, when washing dishes, instead of rushing through it as a boring chore to be finished quickly, really feel the sensations of the water, the suds, the dishes. It can really be an enjoyable task if you learn to see it that way. The same applies to other chores — washing the car, sweeping, dusting, laundry — and anything you do, actually. Life can be so much more enjoyable if you learn this simple habit.

9. Single-task. The opposite of multi-tasking. Focus on one thing at a time. When you feel the urge to switch to other tasks, pause, breathe, and pull yourself back. Read more.

10. Breathe. When you find yourself speeding up and stressing out, pause, and take a deep breath. Take a couple more. Really feel the air coming into your body, and feel the stress going out. By fully focusing on each breath, you bring yourself back to the present, and slow yourself down. It’s also nice to take a deep breath or two — do it now and see what I mean. :)

First Day of Rest of My Life

Pretty interesting journey so far isnt it? Lots more to come

Interesting quote from See You at the Top - Zig Ziglar

"You are where you are because that is exactly where you want to be"

" A dime and a gold piece when they are sitting at the bottom of the ocean"

Blessing in Disguise

Everything seems to fall in place! God's delays are not God's denials!

Time flies so what have I done for the past 3 months?

1) Extraction of all 4 wisdom teeth (ouch) over 2 dental surgeries- including consumption of lots of antibiotics and painkillers
2) Met a lot of people whom I have neglected
3) Spoke to a lot of interesting people, including famous IFA, landbanker, entrepreneurs and I am terribly grateful for their time
4) Went for 4 interviews - including one to set up paraffin plant on Jurong Island!
5) Started my jog routine after my two dental surgeries (and I will continue - should continue my tennis sessions after the renovations are completed)
6) Went for two short trips in Malaysia (Pulau Besar and KL; should have done more!?), one which I proposed successfully to my girlfriend :>
7) Read a lot of books, some which I have always wanted to esp in the self help category
8) Prepare for wedding - Banquet, bought engagement and wedding bands (diamonds are very complicated and expensive, dont like the industry, clearly have wider spreads than finance!), photographers, brothers, booked wedding preparation course, booked wedding shoot date
9) Research on new house, went for open house, have narrowed down to one area (after a lot of thought!) - now need to do some research on renovation before we conclude our purchase in 2010

Pretty good 3-month break isnt it? :>

10 Benefits of Rising Early, and How to Do It

http://zenhabits.net/2007/05/10-benefits-of-rising-early-and-how-to-do-it/

“Early to bed and early to rise makes a man healthy, wealthy and wise” - Ben Franklin, famously

“Put no trust in the benefits to accrue from early rising, as set forth by the infatuated Franklin …” - Mark Twain

Recently, reader Rob asked me about my habit of waking at 4:30 a.m. each day, and asked me to write about the health benefits of rising early, which I thought was an excellent question. Unfortunately, there are none, that I know of.

However, there are a ton of other great benefits.

Now, let me first say that if you are a night owl, and that works for you, I think that’s great. There’s no reason to change, especially if you’re happy with it. But for me, switching from being a night owl to an early riser (and yes, it is possible) has been a godsend. It has helped me in so many ways that I’d never go back. Here are just a few:

1. Greet the day. I love being able to get up, and greet a wonderful new day. I suggest creating a morning ritual that includes saying thanks for your blessings. I’m inspired by the Dalai Lama, who said, ” Everyday, think as you wake up, ‘today I am fortunate to have woken up, I am alive, I have a precious human life, I am not going to waste it. I am going to use all my energies to develop myself, to expand my heart out to others, to achieve enlightenment for the benefit of all beings, I am going to have kind thoughts towards others, I am not going to get angry or think badly about others, I am going to benefit others as much as I can.’ “
2. Amazing start. I used to start my day by jumping out of bed, late as usual, and rushing to get myself and the kids ready, and rushing to drop them to school and come in to work late. I would walk into work, looking rumpled and barely awake, grumpy and behind everyone else. Not a great start to your day. Now, I have a renewing morning ritual, I’ve gotten so much done before 8 a.m., my kids are early and so am I, and by the time everyone else gets in to work, I’ve already gotten a head start. There is no better way to start off your day than to wake early, in my experience.
3. Quietude. No kids yelling, no babies crying, no soccer balls, no cars, no television noise. The early morning hours are so peaceful, so quiet. It’s my favorite time of day. I truly enjoy that time of peace, that time to myself, when I can think, when I can read, when I can breathe.
4. Sunrise. People who wake late miss one of the greatest feats of nature, repeated in full stereovision each and every day — the rise of the sun. I love how the day slowly gets brighter, when the midnight blue turns to lighter blue, when the brilliant colors start to seep into the sky, when nature is painted in incredible colors. I like doing my early morning run during this time, and I look up at the sky as I run and say to the world, “What a glorious day!” Really. I really do that. Corny, I know.
5. Breakfast. Rise early and you actually have time for breakfast. I’m told it’s one of the most important meals of the day. Without breakfast, your body is running on fumes until you are so hungry at lunchtime that you eat whatever unhealthy thing you can find. The fattier and sugarier, the betterier. But eat breakfast, and you are sated until later. Plus, eating breakfast while reading my book and drinking my coffee in the quiet of the morning is eminently more enjoyable than scarfing something down on the way to work, or at your desk.
6. Exercise. There are other times to exercise besides the early morning, of course, but I’ve found that while exercising right after work is also very enjoyable, it’s also liable to be canceled because of other things that come up. Morning exercise is virtually never canceled.
7. Productivity. Mornings, for me at least, are the most productive time of day. I like to do some writing in the morning, when there are no distractions, before I check my email or blog stats. I get so much more done by starting on my work in the morning. Then, when evening rolls around, I have no work that I need to do, and I can spend it with family.
8. Goal time. Got goals? Well, you should. And there’s no better time to review them and plan for them and do your goal tasks than first thing. You should have one goal that you want to accomplish this week. And every morning, you should decide what one thing you can do today to move yourself further towards that goal. And then, if possible, do that first thing in the morning.
9. Commute. No one likes rush-hour traffic, except for Big Oil. Commute early, and the traffic is much lighter, and you get to work faster, and thus save yourself more time. Or better yet, commute by bike. (Or even better yet, work from home.)
10. Appointments. It’s much easier to make those early appointments on time if you get up early. Showing up late for those appointments is a bad signal to the person you’re meeting. Showing up early will impress them. Plus, you get time to prepare.

How to Become an Early Riser

• Don’t make drastic changes. Start slowly, by waking just 15-30 minutes earlier than usual. Get used to this for a few days. Then cut back another 15 minutes. Do this gradually until you get to your goal time.
• Allow yourself to sleep earlier. You might be used to staying up late, perhaps watching TV or surfing the Internet. But if you continue this habit, while trying to get up earlier, sooner or later one is going to give. And if it is the early rising that gives, then you will crash and sleep late and have to start over. I suggest going to bed earlier, even if you don’t think you’ll sleep, and read while in bed. If you’re really tired, you just might fall asleep much sooner than you think.
• Put your alarm clock far from you bed. If it’s right next to your bed, you’ll shut it off or hit snooze. Never hit snooze. If it’s far from your bed, you have to get up out of bed to shut it off. By then, you’re up. Now you just have to stay up.
• Go out of the bedroom as soon as you shut off the alarm. Don’t allow yourself to rationalize going back to bed. Just force yourself to go out of the room. My habit is to stumble into the bathroom and go pee. By the time I’ve done that, and flushed the toilet and washed my hands and looked at my ugly mug in the mirror, I’m awake enough to face the day.
• Do not rationalize. If you allow your brain to talk you out of getting up early, you’ll never do it. Don’t make getting back in bed an option.
• Have a good reason. Set something to do early in the morning that’s important. This reason will motivate you to get up. I like to write in the morning, so that’s my reason. Also, when I’m done with that, I like to read all of your comments!
• Make waking up early a reward. Yes, it might seem at first that you’re forcing yourself to do something hard, but if you make it pleasurable, soon you will look forward to waking up early. A good reward is to make a hot cup of coffee or tea and read a book. Other rewards might be a tasty treat for breakfast (smoothies! yum!) or watching the sunrise, or meditating. Find something that’s pleasurable for you, and allow yourself to do it as part of your morning routine.
• Take advantage of all that extra time. Don’t wake up an hour or two early just to read your blogs, unless that’s a major goal of yours. Don’t wake up early and waste that extra time. Get a jump start on your day! I like to use that time to get a head start on preparing my kids’ lunches, on planning for the rest of the day (when I set my MITs), on exercising or meditating, and on reading. By the time 6:30 rolls around, I’ve done more than many people do the entire day.

20 Ways to Eliminate Stress From Your Life

http://zenhabits.net/2007/06/20-ways-to-eliminate-stress-from-your-life/

I don’t believe that a stress-free life is possible. Stress is a response to challenges in life, and a life without challenges is too boring to contemplate. However, I do believe that most of the stress in our lives is unnecessary, and that it can be eliminated by taking some simple (and some not-so-simple) steps. It can’t be accomplished overnight — I’ve been eliminating stressors in my life for awhile now, and I’m still not done. But I think it’s a worthwhile goal.

Let’s first take a look at an example — it’s a little extreme, but it exemplifies the typical stressors in people’s lives. Let’s say Fred gets up in the morning, waking up late, and now has to rush to get ready. He’s so rushed that he spills his coffee on his shirt and has to change, a nicks himself shaving. He heads out the door and then has to go back in the house because he forgot his wallet. He gets in the car and realizes he forgot his keys.

Now he’s on the way in to work and is in the middle of rush-hour traffic — and his temper starts to flare after someone cuts him off. He’s honking at people, cursing, and arrives to work late and in a bad mood. He snaps at someone and is surly all morning. His desk is covered in piles of paper, and he can’t find that report he needs to work on. His inbox is overflowing and his email notification is going off, and he sees he has 36 messages to respond to. He knows he’s late on two projects and his boss isn’t happy. He’s got to finish 5 tasks before the 11 a.m. meeting, and he’s got meetings all afternoon.

You get the idea. His day does not go well, and he hits rush-hour traffic on the way home. He gets home late, exhausted, completely stressed, his mind still on his late and as-yet uncompleted projects, his still-full inbox and email inbox, and all the stuff piling up that he has to work on tomorrow. The house is a mess and he snaps at his family. His kids have not put things away exactly where he told them to put them away, so he begins to yell at them. He has a quick, greasy dinner in front of the TV and zones out before falling asleep late.

Again, this is a bit extreme, but you can see through this illustration some of the things that stress people out. There are many more, of course, and I won’t cover all of them here.

But these sources of stress can be eliminated with a little thought. Here’s how:

1. Identify stressors. This is the most important step of all, as identifying the things that stress you out in your life is the first step towards eliminating them. Take 10 minutes to think about what stresses you out during the day. What weekly occurrences stress you out? What people, activities, things cause stress in your life? Make a Top 10 list, and see which of them can be eliminated, and start to weed them out. For those that can’t, find ways to make them less stressful.
2. Eliminate unnecessary commitments. I did a post on editing your commitments before … apply those concepts here. We all have many commitments in our life, starting with work but also including commitments related to kids, our spouses, things to do at home, other family, civic, side work, religious, hobbies, online activities and more. Consider each of them, the amount of stress they provide, and the value you get out of them. Edit brutally, and take steps today to remove the ones that stress you out the most.
3. Procrastination. We all do this, of course. But allowing stuff to pile up will stress us out. Find ways to take care of stuff now (form a Do It Now habit) and keep your inbox and desk clear. See 20 Procrastination Hacks for more ideas.
4. Disorganization. We’re all disorganized to some extent. Even if we’ve organized something, and created a great system for keeping it that way, things tend to move towards chaos over time. But disorganization stresses us out, in terms of visual clutter, and in making it difficult to find stuff we need. Take time to get things in your life organized, starting with your desk and the papers in your home, and moving on to other areas.
5. Late. Being late always stresses us out. We have to rush to get ready, rush to get there, and stress out the whole time about looking bad and being late. Learn the habit of being early, and this stress disappears. Make a conscious effort to start getting ready earlier, and to leave earlier. This also makes driving less stressful. Time yourself to see how long it actually takes to get ready, and how long it actually takes to get somewhere. You’ve probably been underestimating these times. Once you know these times, you can plan backwards so that you show up 10 minutes early each time. It’s a good feeling.
6. Controlling. We are not the Master of this Universe. I know we sometimes wish we were, but acting as if we are is a sure way to get stressed out. Trying to control situations and people cannot work, and only serves to increase our anxiety when it doesn’t work. Learn to let go, and accept the way that other people do things, and accept what happens in different situations. The only thing you can control is yourself — work on that before you consider trying to control the world. Also learn to separate yourself from tasks and to delegate them. Learning to let go of our need to control others and the situations around us is a major step towards eliminating stress.
7. Multitasking. Having multiple tasks going on at the same time might seem productive, but in actuality it slows us down from actually focusing on a task and completing it — and it stresses us out in the meantime. Learn to single-task.
8. Eliminate energy drains. If you’ve analyzed your life (in Step 1) and found things that stress you out, you might have also noticed things that drain your energy. Certain things in our life just cause us to be more exhausted than others, with less value. Identify them, and cut them out. You’ll have much more energy and much less stress. Happiness ensues.
9. Avoid difficult people. You know who they are. If you take a minute to think about it, you can identify all the people in your life — bosses, coworkers, customers, friends, family, etc. — who make your life more difficult. Now, you could confront them and do battle with them, but that will most certainly be difficult. Just cut them out of your life.
10. Simplify life. Simplifying, of course, is a major theme of Zen Habits. Simplify your routines, your commitments, your information intake, your cluttered rooms, the mass of stuff going on in your life … and have less stress as a result. Start with Edit Your Life and then look through the other simplicity articles.
11. Unschedule. Create more open periods of time in your life. It’s not necessary to schedule every minute of our lives. Learn to avoid meetings, keep wide open blocks of time where we either work on our important tasks or batch process the smaller ones. When someone asks to schedule a meeting, first try to get it done through email or phone … if that doesn’t work, avoid having it scheduled. Ask them to call you and see if you’re free at that time. You will love having an open schedule.
12. Slow down. Instead of rushing through life, learn to take things slow. Enjoy your food, enjoy the people around you, enjoy nature. This step alone can save tons of stress.
13. Help others. It may sound contradictory to add more tasks to your life by trying to help other people (you’ve got enough to do), but if you were to add anything to your life, this should be it. Helping others, whether volunteering for a charity organization or just making an effort to be compassionate towards people you meet, not only gives you a very good feeling, it somehow lowers your stress level. Of course, this doesn’t work if you try to control others, or help others in a very rushed and frenetic way — learn to take it easy, enjoy yourself, and let things happen, as you work to make the lives of others better.
14. Relax throughout the day. It’s important to take mini-breaks during your work day. Stop what you’re doing, massage your shoulders and neck and head and hands and arms, get up and stretch, walk around, drink some water. Go outside and appreciate the fresh air and the beautiful sky. Talk to someone you like. Life doesn’t have to be all about productivity. You should also avoid using online activity too much as your de-stressing activity — get away from the computer to relax.
15. Quit work. This one’s drastic, and probably too drastic for most. But in most likelihood, your work is your absolute biggest stressor. Getting out of your 9-to-5, automating your income, and finding something you truly love to do, that you’re passionate about, will create a positive life and much less stressful one at that. Give it a little thought before dismissing it — there might be possibilities here you haven’t considered.
16. Simplify your to-do list. I’ve written about this before, but attempting to do everything on your long to-do list will definitely stress you out. Learn to simplify your to-do list down to the few essential tasks, and you will enjoy the process much more.
17. Exercise. This is common advice for stress relief, and that’s because it works … but it’s also a stress prevention method. Exercising helps relieve the stress buildup, it gives you some quiet time to contemplate and relax, and just as importantly, it makes you more fit. A fitter person is better equipped to handle stress. Another important factor: being unhealthy can be a major stressor (especially once you have to go to the hospital), and exercise can help prevent that.
    
18. Eat healthy. This goes hand-in-hand with exercise as a stress prevention method, of course. Become healthier and a major source of stress will disappear. Also, I’ve found that greasy food, for me, puts me in a worse mood and can contribute to stress levels immediately.
19. Be grateful. This might not be as obvious as some of the others, but developing an attitude of gratitude (I sound like a preacher with that rhyme!) is a way of thinking positive, eliminating negative thinking from your life, and thereby reducing stress. Learn to be grateful for what you have, for the people in your life, and see it as a gift. With this sort of outlook on life, stress will go down and happiness will go up. That’s a winning formula.
20. Zen-like environment. Take time to declutter your desk (as mentioned above) and even once you do that, continually edit your desk and working space, and the things in your home, until you’ve created a simple, peaceful, Zen-like environment. It will be much less stressful to work in an environment like that than a more cluttered and distracting on

The Lazy Manifesto: Do Less. Then, Do Even Less

http://zenhabits.net/2009/01/the-lazy-manifesto-do-less-then-do-even-less/

“Practice not-doing and everything will fall into place.” - Lao Tzu

Post written by Leo Babauta. Follow me on Twitter.

How many of us don’t get lazy every now and then? Of course, some of us get lazy more than others — my mom (always a hard worker) once told me she gets lazy, but then she just does the work anyway. I replied, “Mom, that’s not lazy! That’s the opposite of lazy!”

Lazy is often seen as a bad thing, but I disagree. Lazy is an amazing thing.

Here’s just a few reasons why:

1. Lazy means that your body and mind are tired and want to rest. That’s a sign that you should actually rest. When you ignore these signs, that leads to burnout. So rest, and feel good about it!
2. Lazy means you don’t want to work too hard, which often leads to figuring out how to do less work. Just about all of the advances in technology come from laziness: we drive cars instead of walking because we’re too lazy to walk, we use washing machines because we’re too lazy to do it by hand, we use computers because writing things out by hand is hard. Of course, reliance on machines isn’t a good thing, but using laziness to figure out better ways to do things is a good thing.
3. Lazy people don’t start wars. Who wants to go through all the trouble to fight a war? Peace and friendliness is much easier.

“Simple Productivity” has been the motto of Zen Habits from its early days (even though I talk about a lot of other things as well) … and today I’d like to set out the reasons “Do Less” is one of my Four Commandments, and why it’s the ultimate extension of Simple Productivity.

Do Less: The Ultimate Simple Productivity

It may seem paradoxical that Do Less can mean you’re more productive — and if you define “productive” as meaning “get more done” or “do more”, then no, Do Less won’t lead to that kind of productivity.

But if instead you define “productivity” as a means of making the most of your actions, of the time you spend working (or doing anything), of being as effective as possible, then Do Less is the best way to be productive.

Consider: I can work all day in a flurry of frenetic activity, only to get a little done, especially when it comes to lasting achievement. Or I can do just a couple things that take an hour, but those are key actions that will lead to real achievement. In the second example, you did less, but the time you spent counted for more.

Let’s take the example of a blogger: I can write a dozen posts that really say nothing, mean nothing, but take up my entire day … or I can write one post that affects thousands of people, that really reaches to the heart of my readers’ lives, and takes me 1.5 hours to write. I did less, but made my words and time count for more.

If you’re lazy, as I often am, then the choice is simple. Do Less.

But do it smartly: Do Less, but make every action count. Send fewer emails, but make them important. Write fewer words, but make each word essential. Really consider the impact of every action you take, and see if you can eliminate some actions. See if you can achieve a great impact doing less.

This doesn’t mean “less is more”. It means “less is better”.

Do Less: Of Everything

But Do Less means much more than being productive. It goes to the heart of everything we do, of our society. Do Less is nothing less than a two-word manifesto for living.

Here’s how the two-word manifesto of “Do Less” can change everything:

1. Do Less buying. If you spend less, shop less, acquire less, then you will own less, need less, get into less debt, be in better financial shape, have less clutter, and have more time for things that are truly important.

2. Do Less busy-work. Instead of running around doing lots of little things, slow down. Do Less. Live a calmer, more peaceful life. Be content to sit, to do nothing. Relax a little. Smile and be happy.

3. Do Less managing. If you are in a position of authority over others, whether it’s as a manager, executive, or parent … the less you do the better. Many people over-manage, or over-parent. This gives their employees, or children, very little freedom, room for creativity, room to learn on their own, to succeed and fail. The less you do, the more others will figure out how to do things. Do little things to guide and teach, but for the most part, back off and let them be.

4. Do Less communicating. Less talking, less yelling, less arguing, less emails and IM and Twittering, less phone calling. While I think communication is extremely important, and should be one of the keys to any relationship, I also think we do it too much. Especially as most of it becomes nothing but jabbering at each other, with very little actual listening. It is noise. Let silence into your life. Let stillness pervade our minds. When you do communicate, make it count, make it sincere, and more than you talk, listen. Make every email count. Only IM when it’s necessary. Spend less time on the phone and Twitter and Blackberry and iPhone, and more time with humans, more time with yourself, more time in the present.

5. Do Less complaining and criticizing. I won’t rant about how these two things can drag down you and those around you … but instead will say that if you did less of these two things, your life would be better. And we all do them — fess up! I do, and I try to do less of it. Instead, do more kindness, compassion, understanding, accepting, loving.

6. Do Less planning and worrying and future thinking. Spend more time in the moment. We worry too much, and it does us no good. We think about things that haven’t happened, instead of what’s happening now (and yes, I know that’s the name of an old sitcom). And while some planning is necessary, too much of it is a waste of time — there’s no way to predict the future, and trying to control every little thing that’s going to happen is futile. Learn to go with the flow, look for opportunities, find the natural path of things, and do what is needed in the moment. You can’t control outcomes, but if you learn to work more fluidly (instead of rigidly following plans), you can get to outcomes that are good.

7. Do Less judging and expecting. Acceptance is something I’m trying to learn to do more. And that means I need to be less judgmental, and stop having expectations from everything and everybody. If you have no expectations, and don’t judge things, you can accept them. And acceptance leads to peace, leads to happiness. So when you find yourself judging, think “Do Less Judging”. When you find yourself expecting someone to be a certain way, think “Do Less Expectations”. People won’t disappoint you that way, because you’ll learn to accept them as they are, and learn that they are already perfect, as they are.

“Be Content with what you have; rejoice in the way things are. When you realize there is nothing lacking, the whole world belongs to you.” - Lao Tzu

How to Do Less

If you are sold on the two-word manifesto — Do Less — you might be saying to yourself, “Self, that sounds good, but how exactly do I go about doing less?” It’s simple:

1. Do Less. Yes, it really is that simple. Do Less. Take how much you usually do, and Do Less than that. If you’re smart, you’ll naturally choose the more essential things to do, but it’s possible that you won’t, and you’ll just choose whatever is easy or convenient or fun. That’s OK. Go with that. Eventually you’ll probably have to do the important stuff, because it probably has to be done sometime. Or maybe you won’t, and you’ll end up getting nothing done. Then you’ll think to yourself, “Self, there has to be a better way. Either I have to go back to doing more, or I have to choose more wisely in what I do.”

2. Then Do Even Less. If you followed the first step, and you’re now doing less than you were before, congratulate yourself! Pat yourself on the back! Celebrate by going to take a nap. Now, when you’re ready to get started again, try to do even less than you were doing in Step 1 above. Pare some of your actions down. Look for more fat to trim. See if some things really aren’t as necessary as you thought they were. Pass some things on to others, automate other things, delay on still others, and get out of doing still others by calling up someone or emailing them and explaining, “I’m sorry, I just can’t do as much as I originally planned.” Now you’re doing less than before!

Repeat. Keep doing less until you’re doing almost nothing. When you’ve reached that point, congratulations! You’re a master. When you can get by with doing nothing at all, you’ve reached Nirvana and enlightenment and you should really be teaching me instead of the other way around. Feel free to come write a guest post for Zen Habits when you’ve reached this state!

Some other ideas to consider when learning to Do Less:

• Go with the flow. Imagine the effort required to swim upstream compared to moving with the flow of a river. If you go with the flow of things, rather than against them, you will naturally do less, and with less effort.
• Don’t force things. A common mistake — trying to hard, forcing something that doesn’t want to be forced, forcing people to do things they don’t want to do. A lot of effort, action, and time is wasted. Instead, find a smoother way — think of water, which flows around things rather than trying to force its way through them.
• Find the pressure points. In martial arts, instead of using maximum force, you are wise to find the points in the body where less force can be used to greater effect, whether that’s to cause pain or imbalance or some other effect. Well, I don’t advocate finding pain, but the idea of pressure points is a good one: if you can find the little spots where a little action can change everything, can go a long way, you have mastered the Do Less philosophy.
• Let others do. Give others the room and freedom to move, to create, to invent, to learn, to work, to do, on their own. Less time, effort and action spent trying to control others means that you do less, but let others make things happen. It means letting go of control, but that’s a good thing. Other people have creativity, imagination, dedication, good ideas too.
• Let things happen. Often our actions interfere with events that would happen without our actions. In other words, if we took no action, things would happen without us. Sometimes it’s better to let things happen. Step back, don’t act, things will happen without us.

“Doing nothing to disturb the spontaneous flow of things.” - Lao Tzu

The Mindfulness Guide for the Super Busy: How to Live Life to the Fullest

http://zenhabits.net/2009/01/the-lazy-manifesto-do-less-then-do-even-less/

“Smile, breathe and go slowly.” - Thich Nhat Hanh, Zen Buddhist monk

Post written by Leo Babauta. Follow me on Twitter.

The idea of being mindful — being present, being more conscious of life as it happens — seems a bit impossible to many of the super busy.

But not only is it possible, I’d submit that it’s desirable, and that it’ll help the busy (and non-busy) achieve their goals and enjoy life more fully.

One of my favorite web big shots, Digg.com founder Kevin Rose (who is actually heading several companies and multiple other projects), has “be mindful” at the top of his resolutions for 2009. I hope he’s doing well, and I’d love to hear how someone as busy as he is implements a resolution like that.

But in case Mr. Rose, and other super-busy types, are having trouble being mindful and living life to the fullest, this guide will help.

Enjoying Life and Achieving Goals
It seems contradictory to those who are used to sacrificing living for pursuing their goals … but cultivating mindfulness will help you achieve your goals and enjoy life more.

Focusing on one task at a time, putting yourself fully into that task, is much more effective than multi-tasking. Focusing on one real goal at a time is also more effective. I’ve proven it to myself time and again over the last few years (see My Story for more). Focusing on what you’re doing right now is highly effective. You’re more productive when you’re mindful.

But more importantly, being present is undoubtedly the only way to enjoy life to the fullest. By being mindful, you enjoy your food more, you enjoy friends and family more, you enjoy anything you’re doing more. Anything. Even things you might think are drudgery or boring, such as housework, can be amazing if you are truly present. Try it — wash dishes or sweep or cook, and remain fully present. It takes practice, but it’s incredible.

One Month Challenge
The best method I can offer for learning to be present, the best method for practicing, is to focus on it for one month. Make focusing on being present a habit. If you make it your only focus, I guarantee you’ll get better at it, and more importantly, you’ll get into the habit of remembering to focus, of remembering to practice, of being more aware.

Do a one-month challenge. It’s the best method for forming new habits, and it works for being present. A good way to do this is join the monthly challenge on the Zen Habits forums or on The Power of Less Challenge forum. Then do the following:

• Tell people on the forum what your monthly challenge will be (focusing on being present).
• Log in daily to report on your progress. This gives you the accountability and motivation needed.
• Do the tips below every day for a month.

“Do you have patience to wait till your mud settles and the water is clear? Can you remain unmoving till the right action arises by itself?” - Lao Tzu

How to Be Mindful

1. Do one thing at a time. Single-task, don’t multi-task. When you’re pouring water, just pour water. When you’re eating, just eat. When you’re bathing, just bathe. Don’t try to knock off a few tasks while eating or bathing or driving. Zen proverb: “When walking, walk. When eating, eat.”

2. Do it slowly and deliberately. You can do one task at a time, but also rush that task. Instead, take your time, and move slowly. Make your actions deliberate, not rushed and random. It takes practice, but it helps you focus on the task.

3. Do less. If you do less, you can do those things more slowly, more completely and with more concentration. If you fill your day with tasks, you will be rushing from one thing to the next without stopping to think about what you do. But you’re busy and you can’t possibly do less, right? You can. I’ve done it, and so have many busy people. It’s a matter of figuring out what’s important, and letting go of what’s not. Read more: The Lazy Manifesto: Do Less.

4. Put space between things. Related to the “Do less” rule, but it’s a way of managing your schedule so that you always have time to complete each task. Don’t schedule things close together — instead, leave room between things on your schedule. That gives you a more relaxed schedule, and leaves space in case one task takes longer than you planned.

5. Spend at least 5 minutes each day doing nothing. Just sit in silence. Become aware of your thoughts. Focus on your breathing. Notice the world around you. Become comfortable with the silence and stillness. It’ll do you a world of good — and just takes 5 minutes!

6. Stop worrying about the future - focus on the present. Become more aware of your thinking — are you constantly worrying about the future? Learn to recognize when you’re doing this, and then practice bringing yourself back to the present. Just focus on what you’re doing, right now. Enjoy the present moment.

7. When you’re talking to someone, be present. How many of us have spent time with someone but have been thinking about what we need to do in the future? Or thinking about what we want to say next, instead of really listening to that person? Instead, focus on being present, on really listening, on really enjoying your time with that person.

8. Eat slowly and savor your food. Food can be crammed down our throats in a rush, but where’s the joy in that? Savor each bite, slowly, and really get the most out of your food. Interestingly, you’ll eat less this way, and digest your food better as well.

9. Live slowly and savor your life. Just as you would savor your food by eating it more slowly, do everything this way — slow down and savor each and every moment. As I type this, for example, I have my 3-year-old daughter, Noelle, on my lap. She’s just sitting here quietly, as the rain pours down in a hush outside. What a lovely moment. In fact, I’m going to take a few minutes off just to be with her now. Be right back. :)

10. Make cleaning and cooking become meditation. Cooking and cleaning are often seen as drudgery, but actually they are both great ways to practice mindfulness, and can be great rituals performed each day. If cooking and cleaning seem like boring chores to you, try doing them as a form of meditation. Put your entire mind into those tasks, concentrate, and do them slowly and completely. It could change your entire day (as well as leave you with a cleaner house).

11. Keep practicing. When you get frustrated, just take a deep breath. When you ask yourself, “What should I do now, Self?”, the answer is “keep practicing”.

“When you drive around the city and come to a red light or a stop sign, you can just sit back and make use of these twenty or thirty seconds to relax — to breathe in, breathe out, and enjoy arriving in the present moment. There are many things like that we can do.” - Thich Nhat Hanh

Coping with redundancy

From efinancialcareers

Guest Comment: coping with redundancy Part I

29 April 2009

Guy Day

In Part I of a two-part series, Guy Day, managing director at recruitment agency Ambition, looks at the first steps you should take if you lose your job. Part II will be published next week and will discuss how to kick start your search for a new position.

Losing your job can be one of the most stressful events in your life, particularly if you are mid-career and have been with your employer for some time. It’s usually unexpected and its implications are often difficult to comprehend immediately. However, take heart and think positively because redundancy can also provide an excellent opportunity for you to break the mould and change direction towards a more successful career.

It's not just you

The media continues to report the decline in the world economy and the resulting job losses. Seemingly no country, no sector and no profession has been left untouched and around the world thousands of executives have been made redundant this year. Many organisations with revenue in decline have retreated to their core and profitable businesses. Rationalisations, restructurings and redundancies have resulted.

Quite often in this phase of the employment cycle, layoffs can be indiscriminate with regard to ability, length of service and value to the organisation. Back-office teams are often a target because they are non-revenue generating, and in the short term they are a less emotive cost saving.

So, the message must be - it's not just you. It's happening everywhere and you must use this fact as part of the healing process.

Drain away the pain

When you first hear of your redundancy, you may feel a range of emotions, especially anger, but also relief, uncertainty, betrayal, bitterness and sadness. All these are justifiable and normal. You should spend time coming to terms with the decision and getting the emotion out of your system as much as you can. You shouldn’t under any circumstances start to look for another job until you have calmed down and processed the news of your redundancy.

Your anger and bitterness will be evident during the selection process and will deter potential employers. If you cannot shake your loss after four to five weeks, then you may need to seek guidance from professional counsellors to help you through this stage.

Communicate with family and friends

Don’t try to hide your redundancy. It’s crucial that you explain what has happened and that there may be some changes ahead. Also tell your closest friends, although it’s probably best not to make this a general broadcast until you have a plan and can ask for specific help generating leads.

Make a financial plan

One of your immediate issues will be financial. Whether or not you have received severance pay or bonuses, you should undertake a thorough review of your budget for the year ahead. Make sure you have received all your entitlements from the organisation and that your pension payments are in order. Reduce all non-essential expenditure and assume that your new budget will need to last a full year until you are back on your feet again. Undergo the self-review process as well. Once you feel reconciled to what has happened, it’s time to move on and to think about the future.

Exit with dignity

However tempting it may be to express your real feelings during the exit process, try to harness your anger and exit professionally and with dignity. You will need the help of your former colleagues and managers in the coming months for references and contacts.

Explain your termination to potential employers

Discuss your termination and the reasons for it with your employer and your other referees. Regrettably, there is still a stigma attached to being out of work, so potential new employers may think your departure is performance related until you can convince them otherwise.

It’s important therefore that you understand the reasons for your termination so that you can communicate them with confidence to the market and so that your referees - including your former employer - can back you up verbally and in writing. You need to ensure that there is no doubt whatsoever surrounding the reasons for your departure, otherwise your job search could be damaged.

Finally, set yourself a realistic time frame for finding a new role. Be prepared that it could take several months to find the right job – more if you are seeking a specialist or senior position, or if you don’t have the requisite skills or experience. Be persistent and positive during your job search.

5 Foolproof Ways to Produce a Burning Desire for Your Goals

Editor’s note: This is a guest post from Glen of PluginID.

Whether it be getting out of debt, running a marathon, taking a much needed holiday or simply getting in shape, we all have goals. Yet whilst we do have them, and we would love to achieve them, life or other priorities sometimes get in the way.

Whatever the reason for this may be, it’s no secret that goals can be difficult to work towards and at times we need a little motivation to keep going. In this post I want to share exactly how you can build a burning desire towards your goals which will help spur you into action and get the results you’ve been waiting for.

Following are five steps that have helped me focus on and complete many of the goals in my life, I see no reason why they can’t help you do the same …

1. Make Sure You Pick the Right Goal. This is usually obvious, but if you aren’t focusing the following points on something you’re really passionate about then they aren’t going to help. Just like I couldn’t make a keen basketballer get a burning drive to compete in the knitting world championships, this is no different.

To put it simply: if you’re focused on the wrong goal, you’ll never produce a burning desire to achieve it. How do you know if you’re focused on the right goal? Well, of course, there will be different answers for different people, but usually the following test works quite well:

• If money didn’t exist would you still do it? (if your goal is a career / hobby)
• Are you working towards it already in your life?
• If I gave you $10m tomorrow would it still be in your plans?

The last question is a deal breaker because too often people have a desire for money, rather than the act that gets them to a place of financial abundance. Money won’t make you happy, but the process to get there just might. If you answered no to any of those (that apply) then you may need to re-think your desires.

2. Know that You Can Do It. If you asked most people how much they would love to complete their goals, they would tell you how amazing, fantastic and life changing it would be. How they would love to be on the journey of their ‘purpose’ and achieve the things they want in life.

So why don’t most people do it? Simple; we don’t believe that we can, so we don’t even try.

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.” - David Deida

For 2 years I never thought I could make money online and spent my time just watching others become successful while I jumped from one failed project to the next. As soon as I changed my beliefs things really started to turn around for me, and now I’m working from home full-time. As a friend recently said to me, “Get out of your own way”.

You are the only one holding you back. You can complete your goals, every single one of them. Yet, until you firmly believe this, it won’t sink in because knowing you can complete something is one of the best catalysts for generating the pure drive needed to be successful.

3. Keep Notes of Success by Others. It’s very likely that whatever you want to achieve, someone has came along and done it before you. Who are they? How did they do it? What helped them along the way? These are questions that you need to answer, as in the answers may lie some valuable help to aid you in your own journey.

Not only will it help in getting to your destination, but seeing others do it is a great way to know that you can do it as well. I want to make my living online so I follow others who have been able to do the same; I see what works for them and see how I can apply their tactics to my own journey.

This is something very easy to do and I’m sure you’ll find it to be highly effective.

4. Find Companions on the Same Journey. One of the most comforting things in times of need is when you find other people with the same ‘problems’ or other people on the same ‘mission’ as you are. And when you want to produce that extra focus for achieving your goals, it’s no different.

When I got into internet marketing it was nice to find others on forums that were just starting off and in the same position as me. When I wanted to become more social and pushed myself to do just that (public speaking, going out more etc) then I know my less social friends really appreciated knowing that I had once been in their position.

Finding others on the same journey will help you have someone you can measure up against and someone who will keep you encouraged to stay on track.

5. Make Use of your R.A.S.. Our RAS, which stands for Reticular Activating System, and, without getting too technical, has a job to basically to ‘home in’ on things that we should be focusing on. For example if you are reading a newspaper in your living room and one of your children is playing quietly with their toys, it probably won’t affect your attention.

On the other hand, if whilst reading your paper a brown grizzly-bear walked into the room, your attention would be on it instantly and your body would start taking necessary action to help you get out of the situation. Our R.A.S. focuses on things of known importance and priority to us, so if you like you could also ‘train it’ to become a goal-seeking mechanism of sorts.

Every morning, for no more than 5 minutes I visualize what it would be like to achieve my goals. I see myself being successful, having my preferred end result and how it would feel. This keeps me focused on my goal and tells my body “This is what is important to me, stay focused on it”.
In Summary
We all have the ability to make goals and achieve them, every single one of you reading this. Believe you can do it, set a plan to do it, find others on the journey and monitor how they’ve done it.

Some goals will have an end result, a stop sign. Others will be a process i.e. making money online, but whatever they are, just make sure you do one thing: enjoy the process. Right now is all we have; don’t see the journey as a means to an end.

The joy you get from the result is temporary; the joy you get from the experience lasts forever.

Glen traveled to South Africa at 18 years old where he didn’t know one single person. In that time he started PluginID, a site which aims to help you be who you want to be and live the life you want to live.

A Guide to Beating the Fears That Are Holding You Bac

“Every time we choose safety, we reinforce fear.” - Cheri Huber

Post written by Leo Babauta. Follow me on Twitter.

Fear of something bad happening in the future is one of the things that make us human.

Animals might fear an immediate danger, that is happening right now, but only we fear something that might happen, that isn’t happening now, that isn’t even showing its ugly face at the moment.

This fear, some might say, is necessary … it stops us from doing something stupid. But I’ve found most of these fears to be unnecessary, to be baseless, to be holding us back from achieving something.

I recently asked my Twitter friends: “What fear is holding you back?” Their responses included:

• failure
• abandonment/rejection
• intimacy
• success
• being broke
• not being good enough

I think the last one — not being good enough — is actually at the root of all the others. We fear we’ll fail because we’re not good enough. We fear we’ll lose our relationships, that we’ll be abandoned, that we’ll be rejected … because we’re not good enough. We fear intimacy for the very same reason — we might get rejected because we’re not good enough. Even the fear of success is based on the worry that we’re not good enough.

Do you have this fear? That you’re not good enough? I have, for all my life, and I still have it today.

But here’s the thing: having the fear is natural. Letting it stop you from going after your dreams is a tragedy.

I did this, for well over a decade of my adult life. I let the fear of not being good enough stop me from even trying, from even daring to dream.

It turned out that my fears were baseless. I am good enough. I’m not perfect, but who is?

When I was able to overcome this fear of not being good enough, this fear of failure and rejection, and put myself out there in the world, I succeeded. I found out that I was good enough.

And I still have this same fear — I still worry that I’m not good enough, that I’ll fail and flop on my face in front of 100,000 people … but I wouldn’t be human if I didn’t. Even the most successful people — Barack Obama, Steve Jobs, Paul McCartney, J.K. Rowling, et al — they have this fear, even if they don’t show it. But they don’t let it hold them back.

How can you do this? Let’s look into it.

“The greatest barrier to success is the fear of failure.” - Sven Goran Eriksson

How to Beat Your Fears
There is no step-by-step program to beating your fears, but here’s what I’ve learned, first-hand and from others.

1. First, acknowledge your fear. This is a huge first step. If you do just this today, you’ve done something great. Many of us have these fears, but they are at the back of our mind, unnoticed, unacknowledged, as we try to ignore them and pretend they’re not there. But they are there. And they affect us, every day, all our lives. So acknowledge the fear.
2. Write it down. What’s your fear? Write it on a piece of paper. Writing it down not only acknowledges that you have it — bringing it out into the light — but it externalizes the fear. It takes the fear from the dark lurking places in the back of your mind, where it has power over you, out into the light of day, outside of you, where you have power over the fear. Take control over it by writing it down. It is now outside you. You can do something about it. I personally like to crumple it up and stomp on it, but you can do whatever you like. Post it on your fridge as a reminder of your enemy.
3. Feel the fear. You’ve acknowledged it, but you’re still afraid of it. You’re reluctant to even have this fear, perhaps even embarrassed about it. Well, no more. Recognize that you’re not alone, that we ALL have these fears, that we all think we might not be good enough. Yes, even the amazing Barack, the amazing Jessica Alba, the amazing Al Pacino. They have the same fears as you do. I sure do. Repeat after me: there’s nothing wrong with having this fear. Now allow yourself to feel it. Experience it fully. Bask in this fear. It isn’t as bad as you think. It’s a part of you, but it doesn’t control you. From djbarker on Twitter: “Feel the fear & do it anyway.”
4. Ask yourself: what’s the worst thing that can happen? Often it’s not as bad as we think. Do you fear failing in a new career? What would happen if you did? You’d get another job. You’d move on. You’d live. Do you fear being rejected by someone of the opposite sex? What would happen if you were? You’d lick your wounds, you’d find someone else who is more suited for you, you’d live. Do you fear being broke? What would happen if you were? You’d cut back on your expenses, perhaps ask family or friends to help you out for a little bit. You’d find a way to make money. You’d live.
5. Just do it. To repeat: feel the fear and do it anyway. To beat the fear, you have to just do it. See below for some tips on doing this, but what works for me is not thinking, just acting. Like when you want to jump off a waterfalls into the pool below: don’t think about it. Just jump! It’s an exhilarating feeling. I fear public speaking, but when I get up and just do it, I feel great. From Jade Craven on Twitter: “I fear everything. I’ve recently decided to ignore my fears and just go for it! So many opportunities have come as a result.”
6. Prepare yourself for battle. When you’re going to take on an adversary, you prepare yourself. You arm yourself, and have a battle plan, and train yourself. Do this in your battle against your fear: arm yourself, have a battle plan, train yourself. If you want to be a musician but you fear failure … practice, practice, practice, then come up with a plan to succeed, then get all the skills and info you need to implement the plan, then practice some more. Then go out and implement the plan!
7. Be in the moment. Fear of failure (and other similar fears) are fears of the future. We get caught up in worrying about what might happen. Instead, banish all thoughts of the future. Banish even thoughts of past mistakes and failures. Now focus on right now. Do something right now to beat your fears, to pursue your dreams, and forget about what might happen. Just do it, now, in the moment. When you find yourself thinking about the past or future, bring yourself back in the moment and focus on what you’re doing right at this moment.
8. Small steps. Conquering fear and pursuing a life goal can be overwhelming, intimidating. So start small. Just take one little baby step. Something you know you can do. Something you’re sure to succeed at. Then feel good about that (see below) and take another small baby step. Keep doing this, and soon you’ll have conquered a mountain.
9. Celebrate every success! Every single thing you do right, celebrate! Even the smallest little thing. And use this feeling of success, of victory, to propel yourself forward and take the next step. Bill Gates describes a “spiral of success” that he used to build Microsoft up from its early success of MS-DOS, to its success with Windows and Word and Excel and Internet Explorer and all that (I know, blech, but still). Use this idea of a spiral of success in your life — build upon each success, use it as a stepping stone to the next victory.

“To conquer fear is the beginning of wisdom.” - Bertrand Russell